Dear me Sabata, my love. Your views on bondage were correct. I thinkof bondage a different way, kind of. I think that the idea of you, Sabata, controlling me. Not taking advantage of that control, but controlling me. Being your doll. It excites me. To know you won't take advantage of the control you have. Sabata. I trust you won't, I won't even question it. I turst you enough to know you won't. You'll touch me, hold me, be one with me Sabata. We will be one. Even though your controlling me. do I make any sense? I hope I'm not getting you completly lost in my thoughts, love, Sabata.
My secret. You said you were ready. I sure hope so. When you first told me you cut.I kept getting horrible nightmares. It felt like I was feeling your pain, Sabata. All those nightmares I had, were about you. I woud get nightmares about seeing Rissa take advantage of you at knife-point, getting raped, cutting yourself, Sabata, my truest deepest love, I had dreams , about trying to contemplate how much you hurt then.
I couldn't imagine the weight of all of it. I just wanted to badly to take some of it off of your shoulders. Sabata, I had those dreams, because I wanted to take it away so bad. It be able to tell you that I knew how you felt. Of course I know I never will. I can't imagine the pain, not the pain, the numbness. Which is even worse. Its like.. the infinate pain. Was it like that Sabata, or am i on the wrong track? No matter, I was sure feeling something, Sabata. I hope you don't blame yourself. I don't. i don't blame anyone. I wanted to take some of the hurting away.
Its so funny Sabata. How we slowly inched our way closer to this point in our relationship. Slowly told eachother a small bite of the big truth. The bites got bigger, now we are here. so close it seems near impossible to seperate.
Its like we are sewn together so tightly with trust, we might as well be one. We are, Sabata. I think we are. And on top of that trust string, it is protected by our love. It must be a pretty thick string, eh Sabata?